Saturday, February 7

Nerd Pick-up Lines

Sometimes you happen to stumble into a cultural phenomenon. Thursday was just such an occasion. For the entire day of February 5, 2009, Twitter was abuzz with the throat-clearing and post-nasal-drip hacking of nerd pick-up lines. I don't know how it got started, exactly, but some genius inspired everyone to post their favorite nerdy pick-up lines. Here are some of my favorites. Test your nerdiness and see how many of these you get--and feel free to add your own! For fun, I like to imagine Comic Book Guy from the Simpsons saying all of them. (Different font types are for readability).

There is no emoticon for how I'm feeling right now. (This actually was stolen from Comic Book Guy.)

I'd like to put my mechanical pencil in your pocket protector.

What's your sine? It must be pi/2 because you're the 1.

Let me implement your base members, you are my supertype.

You are my density. (My number one most favorite, I think. I would die if someone said this to me.)

Roses are #FF0000, violets are #0000FF, all my base are belong to you.

I was hoping you wouldn't block my pop-up.

I wish i was your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.

I must have accidentally hit the keystroke for god-mode, how else could I be staring at an angel?

According to the second law of thermodynamics, you're supposed to share your hotness with me.

If you keep shifting bits like that, you're gonna cause a buffer overflow in my pants.

I'd like to tunnel through your firewall, open your ports and start seeding.

You're so hot you oughtta be in webcomics!

You're the variable that makes this equation work.

Baby, you're so hot you denature my proteins.

If I were a enzyme, I'd be DNA-helicase so I could unzip your genes.

I can haz u?

How can I know so many hundreds of digits of pi but not the digits of your phone number?

I have a condom and it's still in it's original packaging!

You make me want to calibrate my joystick without the latest drivers.

Baby, I'll treat you like my homework--I'll slam you on the table and do you all night long!

I've been sent from the future to get you pregnant so our son can save the world.

Wanna be my constant?

Before you came along my heart was a variant. Now it's a constant.

Wanna super-poke?

My phone number? Easy, it's the first 10 digits of pi. I moved to St. Louis just to be in the 314 area code.

I wish I were an integral so I could be the space under your curves.

I'd like to be the photon to your electron and take you to an excited state.

If I ever got stuck time-traveling you would always be my constant.

There's no way to disable this pop-up!

How about I be sine squared and you be cosine squared and together we can be one?

1 comment:

Wandering Chopsticks said...

Hilarious! I missed the Twitter buzz on this. My favorite nerd pick-up lines come from Caltech.

"Ladies, come to Caltech, where the men have BIG... brains."


"Why, yes I AM a rocket scientist!"

Once at a club, I met a guy who told me he worked for NASA. He pulled out his JPL (Jet Propulsion Laboratory) business card to prove it. :)